• sarah@healingeyes.org

Where in the World is Sarah

Where in the World is Sarah

New plan…

50 states where is the best place to live and work?

I have to have enough followers to cover some of the states so I can get a good feel for what state would be good for me. I’m 34 so I’m at a good age to start all over. I have no kids to find a school for. This should be easy.

I got myself to an island I sure can get myself to a basic states of the United States. Doesn’t require a uhaul or even a car. Oh yea, requirement, must have mass public transportation. New York could work, not so sure about Chicago though..kinda pricey. Does Atlanta, Georgia have good public transportation I wonder?

And no I am not trying to be like Jonah and going the opposite direction I am supposed to. This is completely logical and a suitable alternative to living on an island in the Caribbean. No, it is not like a paradise everyone imagines. Really..get past a 2 week marker and its really not paradise. It gets to be rather tiny and claustrophobic. The heat is intense, the bugs are well buggy, and the prices are so insane.

No I am not ‘running’. Just re-prioritizing my location. Yea that works. God won’t notice that loop hole.

I doubt anyone really wants to hear about the mundane routine of following God and all that God stuff. It’s rather boring actually. It’s not like this morning I got up and picked up a random person on the street to take her to McDonalds because I had this squeeze on my heart and a voice in my head when I drove past her.

That’s crazy talk.

It’s not like I got some free mango’s from a guy I have gotten to know who has fallen on hard times and totally understands grief and cancer.

That’s just boring talk.

It’s not like I just swam in the ocean under a beautiful son and butterflies flittered over my head as if God was enjoying spoiling me.

That Sh**t doesn’t happen in real life.

God doesn’t try and give a grieving widow a break by showering her with sun and blue water and mangos. No, it doesn’t work that way.

I need to find another state to wander around for say 40 years in. That can totally work. That way I would eat more since it would have restaurants and a Target store.

This is how twisted my mind works. I doubt God’s love because I don’t think I deserve it. I don’t understand why I get to have beauty all around me and an ocean by my side, the sun above me, free time to think and write. All of these things I can’t fathom, why me? I watched Andy die. I was with him during the surgery, the chemo treatments, the vomiting, the feeding tube, the pain and sadness of realizing he was not going to last. I am so brainwashed that now I think I am only to see that. To always be in pain and have no time for myself. To not allow myself to be happy. I can’t be happy when I know Andy is dead. My mind will not let me indulge in such an idea. To pick up your cross and follow Jesus means to suffer constantly. Idle time makes me go mad…I need to be doing something and be busy or else I am letting others down and letting Andy down.

So let’s vote…And seriously I know I have followers and you are just dying to push the vote button and let your voice be heard! Now is your chance! Where should the wandering widow missionary wanna be live?

Healing Eyes
Healing Eyes

11 Comments so far

beccaPosted on  10:37 pm - Jun 27, 2014

Where does your heart long to dwell?

PTPosted on  11:35 pm - Jun 27, 2014

Wherever you are, Sarah, you will be grieving until you move further through this process. If you go back to the US, you will drown the sound of grief in our own ears a little with other sounds. Where you are now, you are confronting it intensely for lack of distractions like hustle, bustle and Target stores 😉 In the bigger scheme of things, that’s not necessarily a bad thing … Where should you live? Maybe your head is spinning in too many directions right now for you to make a big decision like that. Maybe just sit it out and grieve and breathe a bit more and ask God to heal and lead you for this next step of your journey. Love and bubbles, PT xxx

PTPosted on  11:36 pm - Jun 27, 2014

Wherever you are, Sarah, you will be grieving until you move further through this process. If you go back to the US, you will drown the sound of grief in your own ears a little with other sounds. Where you are now, you are confronting it intensely for lack of distractions like hustle, bustle and Target stores 😉 In the bigger scheme of things, that’s not necessarily a bad thing … Where should you live? Maybe your head is spinning in too many directions right now for you to make a big decision like that. Maybe just sit it out and grieve and breathe a bit more and ask God to heal and lead you for this next step of your journey. Or move to Australia. Australia is awesome 😛 Love and bubbles, PT xxx

chemobrainandmorePosted on  12:57 am - Jun 28, 2014

I live in Jersey but spent four years in San Diego, that’s a great place lots to do lots to see but no puplic transportation. I’ve been in Georgia in July and the humidity is oppressive! I did however like Atlanta but the traffic is bad. My vote is good ole Cali!

Penny LanePosted on  2:56 am - Jun 28, 2014

That’s easy! Leave the US! 😉

Timothy SchipperPosted on  11:51 am - Jun 28, 2014

Sarah. You are still grieving. Let the process continue by staying where you are. She’d some tears, but then go on. God wants you to enjoy life again. You are in a beautiful place, maybe none more beautiful. God gave you St. Croix and you do deserve it. God always wants to shower his love a blessings on those he loves.

SarahAndyJourneyPosted on  4:22 pm - Jun 30, 2014

so the Voting looks like the majority say St. Croix. Sigh..alright.. i’ll stick it out a bit longer on this small island. Thanks everyone for participating! I like to hear from my followers:)

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