• sarah@healingeyes.org

Gift from abroad

Gift from abroad

When it’s been 8 months since losing a part of yourself there will be days when you feel entombed in your body. Fear will grip you and tears will tear at your heart. You’ll pass out from loss. You’ll see a gorgeous day outside but realize it shines on a lonely heart. Not only do I grieve my soulmate but I grieve losing the companionship of a close friend.
I keep reading all these things about how widows will just ‘know’ when they are ready to date…to love again. I strongly dislike being in this category.
I don’t know what to feel half the time and I am frustrated by the waves of emotions that come with this path.

My bit of cheer came today after I forced myself to get out and walk to the mailbox. A friend in Japan had mailed me some candy and a cute note. Just like when Andy was sick but now it’s just me to receive. Death touches so many lives. It’s amazing how any of us still walk around each day. I know it’s not my strength that makes me function…it has to be someone bigger than myself. All I can do is give up trying to understand why it had to happen this way.

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Healing Eyes
Healing Eyes

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