• sarah@healingeyes.org

Pink ukulele brings joy

Pink ukulele brings joy

I had a brilliant blog entry all typed up and then the internet dropped and I lost the whole thing. Another part of island life to get used to…free wifi means compromise, but then again I think its much slower than the states anyways.

Today was a fulfilling day at the Boys and Girls Club, although quite frustrating with the Junior high kids. They seem to have no respect and consider me a bother to deal with. Alas, I did get two of the young ladies to listen to me and I think they remembered some of the computer skills I taught them. After the abuse from the older kids was done I got to grab my pink ukulele and searched for Angel who asked to play it again.

Outside the kids quickly swarmed around me to play the ukulele. We ended up having a cute sing along to the ‘Let it Go’ song from Frozen. It’s amazing how many words they know from the song but how little they remember about word comprehension and math. Oh well, a downfall of not enough adults to give them one on one attention with their homework it seems. Some days its me and 20 some 3rd and 4th graders in a small room with picnic tables, needless to say its a lot of yelling and not so much concentrating. Slowly we’ll get there.

I let each kid have a turn with the ukulele and taught them a few notes and how to strum. They really were drawn to it and it was a great encouragement after the older kids put me through the ringer. After I gave all my love and attention to them I drove home to my little apartment by the water. It’s a beautiful view but at night its lonely and dark. When I got home my stomach started to grumble and I realized it was the dreaded time of night where I have to figure out what to make. One thing about gastric cancer is the repercussions it takes on the ones left behind. Andy lost his stomach and ultimately his life but in the process food now has a stigma with me. It seems I have some post traumatic symptoms to work through on dinner time. I remember when I set up Andy’s feed tubings through his gut and how he hated not being allowed to eat real food, so I would eat in another room and away from his gaze. Months later when he was eating small amounts of food there was one evening where we were eating subs. I had a 7 inch sub and he only was allowed a couple inches to slowly eat. We both broke down crying and I had to tuck my sandwich away so not to make him upset and later that night I silently finished it so not to hurt him more. Gastric cancer took a lot away from us and changed me forever…food is not a pleasant affair and lots of food brings back memories of Andy losing his favorite thing while he was ‘alive’. Somehow I’ll have to work through this one but it’s going to take a lot of work since we take food for granted.

Healing Eyes
Healing Eyes

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