• sarah@healingeyes.org

Blessing 6 months in the making…

Blessing 6 months in the making…

6 months in the making, the fruits of my labor were shown to me through the glimmer of a child’s smile. Day after day I waited and prayed for God to do this one thing for me. I asked people around the world to pray for this day to come. Just one day with a special girl was what I asked for. A girl that touched my heart back in February when I first came here. She has grown some since then but still she smiles so big that any pain I feel fades away. Affirmation for what I am doing here, for all my solitude and hours of tears, my doubt, my fears, my anxiety just disappear when I see her laugh. Why is that? She has a mother and she has family…yet I connect with her. She is as stubborn as me, sassy, smart, and perhaps lonely. Why God showed her heart to me I don’t know? Today there were many moments of ‘mentoring’ I’d say on both sides. I had to diffuse a fight between the two girls. Teach life lessons about growing older and showing grace to those younger than you when your enflamed with anger. Taking the higher road as you reach teenage years even if your hurt by another’s actions. What its like to be a woman and how to respect yourself. If I can be one of many who mentor these girls than that should be better than making money right?

When I am at the boys and girls club the children there affect me in a unique way. I am awkward and out of place but they keep coming up to me and hugging me saying, “hi Miss Sarah”. Kids I don’t know and kids that are trouble makers.

I am happy amidst my grief. Amidst my lonely hours missing the past. The silence of my thoughts and scars from loss. Forever half complete but perhaps a glimmer of hope is to be found when showing kindness to others. Serving others … I’m ready God to go. I’m ready to see others lives and be touched by their stories. Doesn’t it say somewhere that there will always be poor and those in need…what we do for the least of these you do onto me?

Tomorrow I am sure I’ll be weak again and fear the next transition…the unknown of what’s next. How long I’ll be here and when will I feel more ‘normal’ or ‘sane’.

Transformation? We can’t change who we are…but we can Let Go. Be refined by fire to mold us into what we were always meant to be behind the walls we put up. God does his greatest work through frail people.

Healing Eyes
Healing Eyes

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