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Author Archives: Healing Eyes



Healing Eyes

Pixie dust gone

Feeding tube time…it smells like vanilla (it gets old smelling after awhile).
We r now pros at hooking up the machine…so I figure when we are 90 and require extra nutrients thru a tube we will be all set.

Cancer sux
Post surgery sux
And having to leave andy to go to work tmrw sux

Yup not a Mushy and hopeful post today..just hard cold truth.

Oh and yoshi agrees! His tummy has taken the brunt of the stress from our little family circle, he’s on tummy meds now too.


video on tube feeding setup

Healing Eyes


Thank you Doug and Rick.
The chair fits awesome and the room is entirely new and homey.
Even though I almost lost the chair out the back of the truck on the highway it made it safe and sound.
It’s relieves Andy’s pain and will help with his recovery over the next months of treatments.


Healing Eyes

Odd world

How odd can one life get…hmmm let’s see.
How about having a hospital bed delivered to your house at 6 in the evening. Now that’s service!
Our living room is a bedroom, our dining room has a tree in it and our toilet is slightly broken.
Yoshi won’t eat and I have to pick up a recliner tomorrow. And bring yoshi to the vet.
Yup ok our life is odd right now.


Healing Eyes


We r home.
Sry for late blog but we got released Tuesday afternoon.
It was a ruff night but we survived and the first nurse visit happened today.
Still working on keeping the pain under control and learning how to do the tube feedings at night.

Tiring day…so short and sweet

Healing Eyes



A moment of quiet at home.. Andy should come home tonight or Wednesday. I am betting Wednesday. He has a feeding tube to bring home with us and the insurance pays for it! I guess that’s rare. Thank you Kalamazoo college for your awesome health care! What else… Hmm… Well done and his elves have a nice surprise for Andy when he comes home but I can’t say what cuz Andy might read this 🙂 but thanks Donnie and joni and mysterious elves. Me and Andy walked alot yesterday and today so far. He is more himself. I’ll keep this as upbeat and non bitter as possible so I end by saying.. Thank you for flowers and food and everything. Now we enter the unknown of no stomach and more chemo. But hey no cancer is good.

Healing Eyes


Oh woe is us..
Andy is feeling better and now spending nights apart is agonizing. Why oh why can’t we Go home Tuesday…I miss our house and being in same room at night.
The pups are sad and want to come home.

Andy is eating liquids (smoothies too)..he’s walking and talking. If the pain is under control they have to let us go.

Wednesday at the latest!!

Healing Eyes

What’s new doc

I am updated out but here goes

1. Nose tube out
2. Swallow test passed
3. No leaks
4. Feeding tube started yesterday, learned how to flush it today
5. Walked 3 laps without walker
6. Sat in chair
7. Talked to me more
8. Sense of humor returning
9. Chest tube might come out tomorrow
10. One day at a time

Thank you to my parents who are patient and keep in constant contact with me
Thank you to Andy’s friends who visit and make him smile
Thank you to my coworkers who make me eat lunches and dinner
Thank you Kalamazoo IT dept for the flowers and thank you president of the college for the orange roses which I assume are the college colors:)
Thank you sister Ann for the dog flower
Thank you Murray for watching my fuzzy pups
Thank you hope lodge for giving me a place to stay by the hospital

Cancer sucks … But hey there are baby grand pianos that I can play and I had forgotten how I do love playing music…I also think I am helping others by filling the healing garden with music (hopefully not too out of tune)

Thx andy for rescuing me from a life without you…I love u too much and I won’t let the nurses forget about you:)

Healing Eyes

Poetic rambling

Learning to cope ..
Learning to be on your own when your loved one is ill..
Not everyone has to endure these learning opportunities.
Those that do either break or bend … I think me and andy are bending like those dandelion wisps in the wind. A gust comes along and bends the stem and pieces of you fly away, taken away to some far off land. But Perhaps those pieces can touch others in some way.

A passing word with someone in the elevator that is going thru there own cancer story.
Someone listening to me play music on the grand piano.
A receptionist who asks how you are knowing full well that you are struggling with a loved one who has cancer…but it’s ok because she understands and another piece of me flies away.
Seeing pain in others takes a piece away…

There is no answer for what is happening..there is no road map..we are just willows in the wind

We r alive. We r still in limbo. We will be ok

Healing Eyes

Conservatory view



Up on the fifth floor there is a garden… It’s kinda neat… Not cold. Andy got his nose tube taken out today because he passed the throat test. no leaks at the seams I guess. Next goal is to walk 2 more laps around the ward..

Healing Eyes