• sarah@healingeyes.org

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Cute memory

One of the great days

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No escape for the suffering

This story is for those grieving...those lost...those in pain with no end in sight. I fear by far this may be one of my darkest posts and perhaps one of many to come. The darkness enfolds me and I snuggle warmly in it. All my life my dark shadow haunts me, welcomes me in its

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Sigh

Is it bad to feel a slight sense of peace tonight knowing that andy is in heaven? I stare at my fire blaze and flicker and remember his broken body leaving this earth at the same moment I had my fire going and I smile. That body was so tired and bruised from cancer. The tre

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My precious

After all the hustle and bustle died down and my traveling across the globe has lessened I finally made myself sleep in Me and Andy's bed. I can't describe the pain that caused, the gut wretching feeling of death that came with it. Alone!I slept pretty good though (but maybe

Healing Eyes

My friend sleeps now. But no rest comes to me.. He was an insomniac and I think he has passed it on to me. I close my eyes and visions begin.. visions of the past. I try to hold on to the good memories, the laughs and the hugs. The cancer creeps back in.Last night I swore An

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Haunting pain

I wake up in the middle of the night screaming..a reminder each night that I am without Andy. He haunts my dreams. Cancer doesn't stop at death, at night I dreamt that andy had cancer still and had two weeks left to live. Then I wake up and the fog lifts slowly and I realize

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The day after?

Each morning I'll get up..put clothes on to veil the grief...if tears are in supply then they will flow out like a steam...if my eyes are dry then my heart will be squeezed and ache. I will let joy come when it comes and treasure moments when I am allowed to smile. Other ti

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Cremation

Now i lay me down to sleep...I pray The Lord my soul to keep.... Now I go to see my andy one last time before his broken body is turned to ash....numbness and sadness follow on my heels. The final steps draw near, I know not what will remain of me, but andy sweet andy will b

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Suffering timeless

When life gives you suffering...stop and think. When the world crashes down around you...stop and pray. If none of this soothes than scream into a pillow. Finally light a fire and watch the flames dance and imagine your loved one by your side. Breathe.... Then cry.. To oth

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When death comes it is beyond imagining or explaining. I held my andy in my arms as he took his last breathe...my heart screamed out in agony. As if his pain has now transferred to my soul. Cancer is the most vile and evil punishment.... There is no justification or reasonin

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