• sarah@healingeyes.org

Tag Archives: non-profit

Blurred lines between work and pleasure

Too often depression and sadness blinds our sight. It’s easier to concentrate on doom and gloom than seeing they joy around us. Yesterday I asked for a blessing and to expand my territory. Those of you who know from past posts that is a prayer I use cautiously. It seems whenever I use it I am blessed that very day, but only when I truly ask with a heart seeking it.

My days are blurred between what is employment and what is a vacation in this journey of mine. Too often I refuse to accept a break out of guilt of did I do enough to deserve it. Running a tiny non-profit just getting off its feet is frustrating and time consuming but without set hours I can’t tell which hours are for work and what is free time. Did I accomplish enough today to allow for fun tomorrow? Through my eyes I see little progress and insurmountable odds against me.

If I step back and list what God has done and what I have done I see progress. However, the progress wasn’t by my doing. The benefit concert coming up was my cousin’s idea after picking her brain. Or was it God using her? Next, were the 2 bands I found led to me by God or my own effort? Anyone can argue this in either direction but I can say I have no experience organizing this type of event and yet it’s happening. God saw to it that I was put with the right people who also have faith and the skills needed. Relieving me of the heavy burden.

Perhaps life is about sharing what God can do to others through a actual actions. If so then I have another example of God working his agenda through me.

I prayed for a chance to sail out to buck island while on st Croix and he arranged one for me yesterday. Once on the sailboat I sat quietly since I knew few of the people going. As we sailed off one of the ladies on the boat started talking to me and I found out she used to be an executive director for a non profit and was in charge of grants and fundraising. Early this month I have been praying for people with fundraising skills and those with a passion for helping others. He answered it through a leisurely boat ride on crystal blue water one afternoon. So was I working or enjoying free time? Will this new connection lead to more support for Healing Eyes? I have no clue as I’m not in control …God is and I’m just hanging on for the ride.

I only pray now for strength to withstand the waves of doubt and grief as the journey becomes more perilous in my eyes but clearer through His.

In a month I’ll be heading to Africa again. This time, however, I have no road map and no fellow ministry to rely on. Just a series of events leading up to the trip that have compiled a huge portfolio in God’s favor.

I’m ever a skeptic and always questioning but I still can believe in something I can’t see because it has worked out for the good so far. Why would it stop working now?:)

 

Healing Eyes

Now what do I do … Island to Deep freeze

There is doubt in decisions made by anyone. It is natural to do One thing and then Doubt it was the correct one. Maybe life is made up of those decisions and doubts but maybe there is always that lingering One true truth. That one thing that as much as we want it to not be the right decision because of the outright impossibility of it actually coming true. So we put up stable walls and security around us to live each day safely but at the same time limit ourselves from living largely. How can we live abundantly but also safely? It’s not possible because no matter what fate can tear those walls down and leave you far from safe and far from a feeling of stability.

What can I do? I am building up some security and stability in order to be in a place that can hopefully raise funds to do what Healing Eyes wants to do in Africa. At the same time it’s going to be a temptation to stay where its clean, safe, convenient, and you can have electricity 24 hours a day with a simple flip of the switch. When the power goes out here you know it will come back on soon but in other areas of the world it can be days.

This blog has been a journey from a personal story to adopt domestically…to cancer…to missionary..and now it’s Healing Eyes. A Non-Profit raising money to bring compassion and empathy back to the children of Africa, to help neglected and impoverished children by not just helping but building relationships and teaching what love is by DOING it. How can I keep sight on that while living in a place completely opposite to the living conditions there? How can I share with others what it’s like there to gain supporters to join? I guess I can’t. But maybe my invisible friend has some sneaky plan to show me how small I really am in this plan.

Rough plan for the next 6 months:

  • Raise money to fund another trip to Africa.
  • Build up the compassion and relationship fund.
  • Meet with the new CPA.
  • Sponsor education for a handful of kids in Africa.
Healing Eyes

What does it all mean?

What is Healing Eyes Plan now that it has more real ties to being a Non-Profit?

Well My time at St. Croix is not over, even though I am heading to Africa for a short mission trip. In february I will return and continue volunteering at Lighthouse Missions until the School year is over in June. So that is 5 more months in the field serving children. Which means money raised will help support rent and fun outings and crafts for the girls I mentor. With the company now having real obligations that are in paper it is apparently more real this all becomes.

With change comes more paperwork it seems. I am beginning to see why people don’t really chose to go this route in a career. Now I am faced with overwhelming IRS paperwork of payroll and then having the Board approve a meager salary for me to keep serving others. What makes it hard to seem conceivable is right now I have no funds in the official company account to even imagine asking for a salary to keep me afloat. How can I plan for and ask for something that isn’t there and seems impossible? Even if I throw a budget out of $400/mo rent payment and then triple it so that the remainder of the funds go to encouraging the kids. Just like my mission statement says, “Help the impoverished and neglected children in at risk communities…”.

So the funds need to go to help the kids but also help me help them. How do I even do the paperwork for that with the IRS?

This blog might seem a bit whiney today…and confusing..perhaps it can show my fear. MY PURE FEAR of the unknown!

Yes I need to raise funds and I’m guessing $2000 for rent and then triple it for a grand total of $6000 in order to be on the right track with the IRS. Maybe I am worrying for nothing…if I ever find a CPA to give me advice or if the pattern of what normally happens continues. Where I sit back and then God takes care of it..but that can only work so far! I magically got medicaid for health insurance but I can’t just magically get a CPA that is free or magically get a salary from an Empty bank account.

Healing Eyes

Delicate Flower in need of Watering

I’m not gonna lie..I’m feeling stupid, a bit silly, and entirely vulnerable.

Why?

I got a ‘grief’ booklet from the funeral home I used for Andy’s funeral one year ago in the mail. I proceeded to read it and each item in it was true to where I am right now. Except the part where I went off and started a Non-Profit and tossed┬ábeing safe out the window. Although maybe that was one of the symptoms of grief in the booklet..come to think of it. So perhaps I am not that ‘abnormal’.

After a hurricane what do you do?

Pick up the pieces!

Help bring some sanity to this delicate little widow (cough cough dear friend who called me a ‘delicate flower’ in need of help) who went out on a limb and started a Non-Profit to help other people. Yes I am in the business to make NO profit and at the same time SERVE others in pain. Yup…it still sounds insane when I say it outloud.

If anything you can get a tax write off before 2014 is over?!
That has to be worth something:) !

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A 501c(3) Non-Profit. Receipts will be mailed to you for tax write-offs.

Healing Eyes
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